I climbed onto the bus and took my seat quietly.  As everyone around me went through the early morning ritual of waking each other up by being as noisy as possible, I sat, staring out the window.  My mind was working too fast, that early in the morning. 

 

I sat motionless as the scenery slowly moved behind me.  Should I tell anyone? I thought. What would I say?  How would I put it?

 

“Hey, guys!! What’s up? Did you finish all your homework?  Yeah, did you see Cosby last night? Oh, by the way… uh… my mother is an alcoholic, she’ll be in a rehab center for six weeks!!”  Somehow I don’t think that would work.

 

My Mom, an alcoholic!?  It’s so weird.  I recalled the conversation my Mom and I had on the way back from the dentist.

 

“Remember, last year, when I saw Paul Reese, the therapist?” she started.

 

I nodded, I remember having to sit in a group therapy session.  I was afraid to open my mouth.  I thought he might try to blame me for my being so upset lately. 

 

There we were, all eight of us crammed into a room with Mr. Reese.  He asked us how we felt about our mother.  I didn’t know.  She was my Mom, how was I supposed to feel?

 

“Yeah, I remember,” I said softly.

 

“I went to see Mr. Reese because I felt I was drinking too much.”  she continued, “I stopped drinking.”

 

“After many sessions, Mr. Reese felt it would be okay if I started drinking again ‘socially’.  Well… It wasn’t okay.  I can’t drink JUST ‘socially.’”

 

“So, what …are you saying Mom?”  I asked cautiously.

 

“Ted, I’m an alcoholic.”  She looked me square in the face when she said that.  I froze, I couldn’t believe what she just said. I ran it through my head again to be sure I heard it correctly.

 

“I have to go away for a while.”  She said, now looking back at the road.  I just kept staring at her.

 

“But…” I stammered.

 

“Ted, I tried to stop drinking, alone; and I couldn’t.  I need help.  If I don’t get help it will only get worse.”  she paused for a moment, “I’ve decided to join Alcoholics Anonymous.”  

 

“For how long will you be gone.”  I asked.

 

“Six weeks”

 

“Six Weeks!!?  Why so long?” I cried.

 

“It takes a while to learn how to change your entire life, Ted.”

 

“When do you leave?”

 

“Tomorrow around five, so I’ll be able to see you after school before I leave.”  The rest of the trip was deathly quiet.

 

My best friend, Indris, tapped me on the shoulder and brought me back to the present.

“Hey, what’s wrong?  Why are you so quiet?”

 

I have known Indris Klimanis all my life.  He is my height and has sandy brown hair and brown eyes.  His parents were both born in Latvia and he can fluently, although reluctantly, speak Latvian.  

 

I have never kept anything from him.  He was my best friend.  I started to tell him, but something stopped me.  What if he didn’t understand?  What if he believed that stupid myth that alcoholics are always drunk?  What if he treats me differently?

 

“It’s a disease like any other.” my Father had told me.  I had to keep reminding myself of that.  “It is just a disease, there is nothing bad about your Mother.”  I knew that, but would other people. It’s just a disease.

 

“Nothing” I finally said, “I’m just a little tired, is all.”

 

“Not me, I had another one of my weird dreams,” Indris said with a chuckle.  He always had weird dreams.  Indris was just… unique, but he always made me laugh.  “I am sitting in a giant rubber duck, in a top hat and tails…”  I spent the rest of the ride listening to Indris’ dream.  I even laughed once or twice.

 

The rest of the day I was in a daze.  I wondered if anyone else knew.  I was afraid any minute that someone would run up to me and ask me if it was true.  Was my Mom really an “Alkie”? What if no one understood?
  I hid from everyone.  If someone came up to me and asked what was wrong, I just said “nothing” and walked away.  It’s just a disease, it’s just a disease. 

 

The day took forever.  I thought it would never end.  Finally, I climbed onto the bus, glad that the day was over.  I took my seat quietly.  As everyone around me went through the daily ritual of saying goodbye, once again by being as noisy as possible, I sat staring out the window.

 

Again Indris asked me what was wrong.  Ah hell!  If I couldn’t tell Indris, who could I tell?  I turned to him, looked him square in the eye, and told him.  When I finished, there was a long silence.  Then he looked up at me a little uncertain, then he said  “It’s just a disease, you know”?